Roger Loring, a retired teacher and coach from Gloucester County, recently had his second book published. I Don't Text While Driving, Walking, or Standing Still offers his humorous view on life from the perspective of his "if-they-don't-have-a-senior-discount-I'm-not-going-there" age. The book shares essays illustrating that a baby boomer's journey through an increasingly complicated world can often be a journey full of laughter.
Upgrading his cell phone: "The girl from Verizon said I should consider getting a smartphone. I can't fly a plane with propellers, and yet they think I am ready for a jet."
Invention of the TV remote: "This device made it clear that men have the attention of a mosquito in a nudist colony."
Buying toothpaste: "…how to decide whether to get the tartar/plague/gingivitis-fighting toothpaste or the enamel-strengthening/pro-sensitivity/extra-whitening toothpaste or the gingivitis/medium-whitening/fresh-breath toothpaste…never mind."
Politics: "It seems the goal for political candidates is not to present a finely-tuned plan for the future, but just to paint their opponent as some sort of low-life, sap-sucking, dog-breath, sleaze ball whose election would bring about Armageddon. Perhaps that is understated a bit."
Conversation patterns of men and women: "When faced with a statement or question that requires a response, very few men would use a sentence instead of a phrase, a phrase instead of a word, a word instead of a shrug, nod, or an unintelligible guttural sound. This observation does not apply to women."
The book is available at www.rogerloring.com, as well as amazon.com and other online bookstores. Loring's first book, Why Men Don't Ask For Directions is also available at amazon.com.
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