May 11, 2008
Grooms get into wedding planning
James Barr is getting married soon. The 25-year-old is an alderman in a small town just west of Chicago. He's also a graduate student, finishing a master's degree in public administration. But his busy schedule isn't stopping him from being part of the wedding planning.
"I always planned on playing a pretty active role in the planning," says Barr. "My fiancée just thought we would go into it together."
 Courtesy SilverMind Portrait Co. |
The groom's bigger role in the planning isn't so unusual these days, says Carley Roney, editor-in-chief of theknot.com.
She says more couples are getting married at an older age than ever before and, "many couples are paying for parts of it together."
Roney says with personal finances at stake, the groom willingly meets with wedding vendors. "Once your money's involved, you're going to care if its freesia or tulips." And, she adds, "They really want something that reflects them. Once [the guests] know you planned it, there's a real uniqueness to it. It becomes more personal overall."
Thirty-two-year old Lee Fernandez recently got married in Los Angeles. He echoes Roney's sentiments. "It's a big reflection of one couple, not one person. We made sure we expressed what we wanted because we planned it. I would have been mad if I didn't give any input."
Fernandez says he had 50 percent input on just about everything from the flowers to the reception location, to the dinner planning and the cocktail hour. He says he was the sole planner when it came to coordinating the groomsmen and the limo transportation, while his wife saw to her own bridal entourage.
Roney says men typically have the most input on the reception. "The reception site makes the biggest statement" and is also the biggest expense. Roney says planning the menu is also very important to grooms. She says another aspect is they get involved in is photography.
Roney says with couples shouldering the wedding bill, men no longer "feel spooked about getting involved in the planning."
-- Simone Orendain is a DeKalb, Ill.-based freelance writer.
Copyright © 2008, The Virginia Gazette
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